There was something wrong with my kitchen faucet. The cold water only trickled out, eventually declining to a steady drip. My water heater temperature is impressively high, a fact with which I took no issue for years, partly because I love being steamed like a tasty crab in the shower and partly because the intense … Continue reading Fear: Laying It to Rest Part 3
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Fear: Running into the Dark Part 2
Many people hate being single. I am not one of them. I could argue that’s due to a strength of character and admirable dependence on self, a usually undeterred cheerfulness, and a solid internal relationship. It is. I could explain that it’s based on my relationship experience being summed up by the word “agony” and … Continue reading Fear: Running into the Dark Part 2
Fear: Worthy of Honor Part 1
“Fear is weakness. It is evidence you don’t have enough faith or self-confidence. Fear is an emotion and emotions can’t be trusted. Suppress it, silence it, strike it from your psyche. Confess it only as a lament and an apology, “I am afraid; it’s stupid, I know.” Confess it as moral failure: Father, forgive me … Continue reading Fear: Worthy of Honor Part 1
The Fear of Kindness
Have you ever seen an animal that cringes when you raise a hand to pet it? We all know why: Someone hurt the poor thing. Not just once. Over and over, until it is sure of the meaning of a raised hand. It anticipates the pain to come with your approach. You can often tell … Continue reading The Fear of Kindness
Searching For Adventure: A False Pursuit Part 2
(You may have noticed that it's been closer to two weeks since my last post, though I directed any readers of the first part of this double header to return in a single week. I like to keep you in suspense. Or maybe I had a heck of a week. Perhaps we'll never know. I'm … Continue reading Searching For Adventure: A False Pursuit Part 2
Searching for Adventure: A False Pursuit Part 1
As a child, I longed for adventure. Among my fantasy repertoire, I imagined I was a princess secretly placed with a normal family. Everyone around me knew this but was sworn to silence. As I walked to my elementary school, I interpreted the bored glances of commuters as a tacit acknowledgement of my importance and … Continue reading Searching for Adventure: A False Pursuit Part 1
Hope Revisited: The Agony of Desire
I think you know this. I think you know the ache so deep it swells up until your throat throbs, until your body threatens to fracture with longing. I think you know how to tuck (or shove) everything back down before you walk out of the bathroom stall, wake your children, or begin the business … Continue reading Hope Revisited: The Agony of Desire
Hope Is a Setup, One Way or Another
Living in hope necessitates an effort toward imagining a better future. It requires our investment in the tangible ways we can make that future happen and the psychological/emotional ways we open ourselves to it as a possibility. It requires imagination that may even seem outside our ability to fathom. If your experiences, perhaps even your … Continue reading Hope Is a Setup, One Way or Another
Your Body as Home: Inhabiting it With Gratitude
It is incredibly defeating to encounter person after person caught up in the same struggles as you, without evidencing hope of overcoming them. It can be terrifying to witness your greatest fears come to pass in other people’s lives and wonder if you will be visited by the same griefs. There is a pain, so … Continue reading Your Body as Home: Inhabiting it With Gratitude
The Imperceptible Nature of Growth
Change is borne out of a million different interactions, thought pattern adjustments, minute transformations, moments of healing, challenges, encouragements, affirmations, and simply acts of love and acceptance. It is found in a word, or phrase, a strong wind against our face, a walk, a question, and yes, even watching a seed sprout. Growth is a cumulative process.